Shades Of Deceit
Shades Of Deceit

Hello Yarners, I just can’t believe we’re seven weeks already on this trip; Shades of Deceit.

First on the beat is to report that last week was quite an interesting week in the back-room of Shades of Deceit, I’m actually tempted to share it, but trust me to serve it to you in our sizzling hot ‘The Studio edition of Shades of Deceit‘ which would come immediately after the Shades of Deceit Finale…and boy are we getting close…

Our special mentions for this week would go to @Abiola for her return to the comments page and definitely to our regular @Zikora for her consistent comments …but I can’t stop without sending a big one to @Egerue Onyinyechi who’s been sharing our links on facebook. Finally, to that special ‘You’ who won’t  stop supporting us by re-posting the links on BBM and Whatsapp, sharing on Facebook, re-tweeting on Twitter and commenting on the page, we say a very big thank you.

And to our feature presentation for the day – Enjoy Shades Of Deceit VII – and yes … do drop a Feedback!

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In the previous episode of Shades Of Deceit
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Incoming Call – Sylvia

He hissed.
Like he was on auto-response, Chika reached out for his phone… tapped a button and watched the screen of his phone as it dialed his wife’s number. She was still on his quick dial.

He plugged the phone to his ears and soon enough there was that familiar buzzing sound from the other end.

‘Hello,’ she said, from the other end. Her voice composed and strong.

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‘ She had seen Uncle Michael bring it in with him on Saturday, the same day she had arrived from Lagos, but she had not yet had the opportunity to see its contents.

She salivated as she opened the card… ‘This is not true,’ she muttered to herself, shaking her head as she read out the words in the card slowly, like someone in a trance.

I’m sorry I hit you again. This definitely is the last time. And even though I know I have said that before, I promise to keep my promise this time. I love you booboo. You’re ‘MyGoodThing’.
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//Semantics. And. Suggestions. Of. Murder//




Gwarimpa, Abuja.


Pastor Michael could feel the charged atmosphere and he knew he had the congregation’s full attention at the moment. ‘But it’s true,’ he continued, his eyes questioning the congregation, ‘Stop looking at me like you have not heard people translate woman to woe man, expanded further to mean woe unto man. And also the assertion that God has not rested, ever since He made woman,’ He paused for effect, letting his words sink into the congregation as his eyes scanned through the auditorium, seeing nothing but a sea of heads.

‘But I’m sure you want to know what really happened in Eden, right?’ He asked, smiling as he heard the shouts of Yes Pastor!

His smile bore an uncanny resemblance to the knowing grin of a father, who was about to present to his children, their Christmas gifts. And just then he started, ‘In Eden, God never set out to make woe man, like some people have now dubiously coined woman, what He did when He put man to sleep in Eden, was a se-pa-ration, not a cre-a-tion, get that right,’ he said, stressing the ‘separation’ and ‘creation’ for emphasis.

The church was quiet.

He liked it when the congregation was as quiet as this; he could feel them almost begging him to serve them some more. ‘Can I close up service now?’ He asked, teasing the congregation.

No Pastor! They screamed aloud, urging him on.

‘Ladies, you just cannot afford to miss the women conference that’s coming up from the tenth to twelfth of October, you need to know these things and not let any man tell you different,’ Pastor Michael digressed, while making sure he looked straight into the congregation to hold their focus.

This congregation didn’t look like they had a plan to go anywhere. They were entranced.

‘Just the way we have different types of cars, what God was making in Eden was a different type of man. This is not creation, this is make-tion,’ he said, causing a section of the congregation to erupt into laughter, while pictures of members nodding their heads in admiration flashed across the big screen.

‘I don’t have all the time, but in closing I’ll just try to describe the emotions that were present in the male-man in Eden, that led to the formation of the word, woman.’

The atmosphere in the church was super charged, but the congregation was super quiet. Thousands of eyes peered at the man on the pulpit in anticipation of his next words.

‘When a truck, sees a Porsche for the first time,’ Pastor Michael started, choosing his words like bullets, and shooting every syllable from his lips to the congregation with the deliberate precision of a sniper, ‘it’s inability to find words to describe the elegance of the machine and it’s excitement would make it go, Whoa! Car!! And in the same way, when Adam, who by the way is built like a truck, woke up to see this beautiful, exquisitely made, intricately designed being in front of him, he was struck with awe, and his amazement spiked to ecclesiastical proportions, leaving him with no choice but to rhapsodize, Whoa!…

‘Man!!’ The church chorused along with their pastor. With excited shrieks of Halleluiah!! renting the air and general applause from the congregation.

Rhema!!! A male voice caught in an instant of spiritualistic seizure thundered in pure ecstasy.

The big screen captured a few from a slew of the excited faces, with two ladies pictured on the big screen high-fiving themselves. It was a party and everyone was clearly animated.

Yewande stared blankly from where she sat, detached from the euphoria that was sweeping across the auditorium. She tried to form a picture in her head of Pastor Michael, the same one on the pulpit preaching, hitting or slapping his wife, but the images just wouldn’t add up, no matter how hard she tried. He was too spiritual.

She tried to form another picture of Uncle Michael, her brother in-law, hitting or slapping her sister, Laide, but the images again just wouldn’t form. Uncle Michael was too loving.

Maybe her intuition was wrong and she was just fruitlessly looking for trouble in paradise, after-all her sister looked very happy.

Ask her, a voice nudged her.

‘I’ll ask,’ Yewande replied, a bit too loudly as the person sitting beside her turned to ask if she was talking to him.

‘No,’ she replied with a smile, cut off from her reverie. ‘It’s the message, it’s just too powerful.’ She lied as she adjusted herself on her seat, her attention now fully focused on the pulpit, where the music group was about to start their ministration.



Gwarimpa Estate, Abuja.


Yewande held the novel, ‘Ransom’, in front of her face a while longer than she would have wanted to, before tossing it on the bed beside her.

It was not because the novel wasn’t interesting as it was written by her favourite writer, Danielle Steel, but rather because this was a time she had been waiting for the whole day, a time when her brother-in-law would leave the house and thus present her with an opportunity to speak with her sister, alone.

‘Where’s Jerry?’ She asked as she stepped into the sitting room, her sister reclining on the chair, watching Joyce Meyer preaching on television.

‘He’s sleeping. He dozed off immediately his teacher left,’ Laide replied, her eyes glued to the television.

Eya,’ Yewande said as she sat down on the soft cushioned chair closest to her sister, ‘I thought her schedule was in the morning?’ She asked, referring to the Joyce Meyer broadcast.

‘That’s on TBN,’ Laide replied with a smile on her face, her eyes still fixed on the television. She was engrossed by the message.

Yewande was therefore delighted when the program ended shortly after, as she had been deliberating in her mind whether or not to proceed with her inquisition. ‘Sister,’ she called softly, as if scared, immediately the broadcast ended.

‘Yes,’ Laide replied as she scanned television channels with the remote.

‘I’d like to talk with you.’

Laide stopped. Her sister was never this formal with her, except it was something serious. ‘What about?’ She asked, her eyes probing with care. ‘Is it about the introduction?’

‘No Sister,’ Yewande replied, forcing a smile. She suddenly felt a need to abandon the idea as she didn’t know exactly how to start the discussion.

‘So?’ Laide probed almost impatiently.

Yewande sighed, ‘Nothing Sister.’

Laide’s eyebrows curved in suspicion, as she sat up, ‘You know you can talk to me, or is this about the wedding? Are you having issues with Osas?’ Her voice carried a tinge of worry.

‘No …No,’ Yewande stuttered, ‘It’s not the wedding and it’s not Osas.’ She replied, watching her Sister’s face crease in worry, a testimony to her growing impatience. ‘When I arrived on Saturday Sister, you had a bruise on your lip, I was just wondering how it really came about.’ Yewande started.

‘But I told you,’ Laide replied, her eyes squinting inquisitively, not sure where the discussion was heading to.

‘I know you did Sister but …’ Yewande’s voice tailed off as she sighed, raising her head to look her Sister straight in the eyes. ‘I want to be sure.’

‘Sure …that?’

‘Sure that the wardrobe was not Uncle Michael’s fist or his palm,’ Yewande blurted out, her eyes lighting up as she spat the words at her sister. She had become obviously tired of the game her sister was playing. ‘And before you cause yourself to sin by lying Sister, I’ve seen the card where he was apologising for hitting you.’

Laide’s upraised body slumped back into the comfort of the chair like the aching body of a boxer would hug the canvas, shortly after receiving a knockout punch. She swallowed the words already formed in her mouth as the quiet sound of saliva went down her throat. ‘It’s just this once,’ she heard herself saying, her eyes avoiding the stare from her sisters’.

‘It’s not the first time Sister, don’t defend him,’ Yewande’s obviously emboldened voice replied. ‘It’s on the card, he apologised for all the times he beat you, promising you like he has always done that this would be his …’.

‘So what do you want me to do?’ Laide asked, interrupting her younger sister’s rant. ‘He’s my husband.’ Her body racked with pain, as those words spilled out from her lips. ‘He’s my husband,’ she repeated, her eyes bearing pain and anguish.

‘Why don’t you talk to daddy, he can talk to him or better still, report him to his parents,’ Yewande suggested as she left her chair to sit on the arm-rest of her sister’s chair.

‘How can we preach against third parties in marriages and then go against our very own counsel?’ Laide asked. ‘Besides how do I explain to the world that my pastor husband beats me?’

‘Your family is not the world Sister,’ Yewande countered, ‘and trust me those rules changed the moment he raised his hands on you, I’ll kill any man who does that to me and if you won’t tell daddy and mummy, I will,’ Yewande replied fiercely, her voice relaying her anger.

‘You will not do any of such. Yewande you cannot do that, please, I’m begging you,’ Laide groaned, her pain overwhelming her as a tear ran down her cheek. She made no attempt to wipe it off as she held her sister’s hands, searching her eyes for confirmation that the secret was safe between them. ‘I beg you in the name of God, if he hits me ever again, I’ll report him to daddy immediately, but please don’t do it just yet.’

Yewande freed her hands from her sister’s grasp as she closed her up in a tight embrace; it broke her heart to see her sister in such pain. ‘I’ll kill any man who lays his hands on me,’ she whispered to her sister.

Laide smiled. ‘Even when you’re married to him?’

‘That would make his killing even easier,’ Yewande replied, ‘I’ll just poison him.’

Laide unlocked herself from the embrace to look into her sister’s face. She looked so much older at the moment and nobody would have believed that they had ten years between them. And just then she saw the familiar mischievous grin playing around her lips. ‘You’re such a naughty girl,’ she said, as she drew her back into her arms as they both burst out laughing. It felt beautiful to have someone to hold and share her secrets with. As the warmth from the embrace enveloped her being, Yewande’s words resonated in her head, ‘That would make his killing even easier, ‘I’ll just poison him.
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Last week’s poll saw a remarkable 50% of polled, vote ‘ absolutely wrong’  for playing snooping games in your partner’s phone and that raised the question of trust, forgiveness and all the sorts …which brings us to the poll for this week -Why Would You Forgive A Cheating Partner? Feel free to click on the circle by your preferred option and go ahead to click on Vote to participate in the poll and see the results. You can share any extra thoughts in the comments section. have fun!

I'm a Christian, MinDeveloper, Thinker, Entrepreneur and a Yarner.


  1. Abeg third parties are allowed in some cases esp abuse cases. Its neva the victim's fault and I would never make excuses for an abuser.

    1. I so agree. It's either third party or life of hell. Men who beats their spouses are worse than animals! I wonder how women can cope and even excuse hands that hurts instead of care.

  2. Laide pls don't poison ur husband o.U can separate frm him until he changes.Nd it doesn't make sense to cover up or defend an abusive husband.

  3. I don't think anybody should wait till they are almost dead or deformed before they report an abusive partner. To me, once is more than enough to tell the whole world that your spouse is abusing you. Don't wait till he kills you (like in the case of the banker) before you take action.
    Chai, our beloved pastor is not just a cheater, he's also a wife beater. Diaris God oooo. The secret will be out sooner than expected. God is not unjust.
    Thanks once again Dan and team. See U guys next saturday.

  4. I agree Ihunnaya. Short. Poison ke ,please oo Laide, third party is better than poison.
    Laide is just in the marriage for pride. What will people say. They will say eyaaaa, when you are dead. That's all.
    May God give us the strength to walk away when we should. Amen

  5. One thing about most African women is we endure what God dnt ask us to endure bcs we count people's opinion more than our peace of mind and life" what will pple say" syndrome. Even the oyinbos that brought religion to Africa separates when their life is threaten physically or emotionally. Women should learn from Ananias and Saphira and stop covering up their hubby's evil ways.

  6. too short but a beautiful piece. maybe a little poision, just to make him sick(just kidding). But, she should do something about his hitting or it geta worst. Afterall, he is cheating wc exposes her beyond wat she can imagine.

  7. Hmmm....waiting patiently for the next episode! Laide watch out!! Yewande can do the poisoning on your behalf! She can do bad all by herself. Michael is so wrong for the things he's done to that woman but I can't imagine he would harm her grievously or kill her. He's shown to be cautiously calculating and he knows Laide will stay because of her twisted values.

    About the poll.....I voted D. I've always said I will not stay with a man who cheated or cheats on me. However, it can be complicated and it may depend largely on other factors.

  8. My wife will never cheat on me. If your partner does try to forgive while you make necessary amendments and search within what and where it all went wrong.
    It's not only in Africa that women endure abuse, Africa is catching up now with more light been shown or more discussion's around abuse.

  9. Any woman that stays quiet in the face of any form of abuse is a fool. When he kills u, less than a year later he will take another wife. Thumbs up Aideyarn!

  10. Omg!... emi Layemi!!. Poisoning Is Too Darn Easy..and pretty Effortless. Its The norm Dt Most Abusive People Are Weak and Their source Of Strength Is Mostly From Their Victims Fear And Silence. The Very Day U Stand Up For Urself Is D Day U Take A Step Twrds d End Of Abuse. To All Laide's Out Der...if U R In An Abusive Rltnshp And U Love Him Too Much To not Walk Away, and U knw He Loves U too, u Cant Afford To Be Quiet. U Need To B Able To At Least Speak To Someone U Cn Trust, after Brkn D Spell Of Silence,
    Kindly endeavour To Treat His Fuckup Through any Of The Following Ways:

    1· Arrange ur Brothers or male frnds to Beat The Sh*t Outta His Senses. Note: u Have To B present During This Beating With A Cold Hard Bewitching Stare Transfixed On Him Truawt. After Which U Nurse His wounds In Silence Bt Let Him Sleep On D Couch for 1month.

    2. Develop ur Inner Strength....tie Him To D Bed Post While Hes Asleep...or Seductively Tie Him...doesnt Mata How U do It...jes Tie Him Up And Beat D Devil Out Of Him....*note: dont Forget To Video Tape This And Get A Confession Out Of Him* and Do Nytg U Fink A Blackmailer Will Do Wit It ...

    3. Witch Hunt Him.....he Tinks He Left His Wallet On D Bedside Drawer...skillfully Move It To D Wash Hand Basin...he Knows He Ironed His Shirt Before Goin To Bed...make Sure Its Semi Damp And hanging On The Dryer The Next Morning....he Knows He Has Prepared His Notes For Church Sermon D Next Day..give Him An Overdose Of A Sleeping Drug So He Doesnt Rmbr To Practise And He Also Gets late To Church.....all These And Any Other Ingenious thoughts Should Do The Trick. Before Long i Believe The Respect U Deserve As A Woman Wld B Duly Accorded.


      1. @Des Are you starting a girls group up in here? ..take it easy now *smiling* these your methods are something else and trust me, there's someone who's reading this piece and is right now being tempted to take your advice .... @Pearl i can see that you're really really vexing...Dogs? *its a serious matter*

  11. Jeez......what an advice,who wIll be your witness when you poison him?I can for the life of me figure out why you would cover up such abusive crimes.

  12. Intriguing story. Laide laide laide u wan die abi? Kip covering up for ur shitty asshole of a pastor husband nd wen u die ur kids ll hear wee n of cause d idiot ll get a new wife.cry out so he ll know u gat brains too, he ll get embarrassed nd next time he wants to hit he ll remember dat pple ll hear n see him as a fake ass pastor who hits his wife n contradicts wat he preaches against. Don't poison him but stop letting him toss u around.

  13. This is the first time I'm commenting and I just couldn't help but comment cos I thoroughly enjoyed myself. I don't know if I enjoy the work more or the diversity of comments I read. I particularly enjoy Des comments. Plus I can't find Larry or Adewale's comments anymore.
    Big ups to the Team and I hope Pastor Michael gets his due reward for his philanderings ways.
    Didn't mean to talk so much. But I know its allowed as I have seen longer comments by Des and Zikora. Keep the good stuff coming

    1. My name is Dunni and its a pity my first comment bears anonymous...lovely work guys. And like Ihunanya and Noksis said, this episode is too short

  14. I'm so loving Des and her comments... I wasn't raised in a home where my father even called my mother names so I can never ever allow a man get this far. Once he starts trying to break you emotionally, I think that's where you make your exodus. I can't even stand a man calling me stupid...


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